Sprout Palooza - Stand-Up Comedy

Audience applauses after the music video; back at the stage, we see Chica, Ricky, and Curtis E. Owl.

CHICA: Squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak! (I'm having so much fun!)
RICKY: So are we, Cheeks!
CURTIS: So, what's next?

Brendan Fraser enters.

BRENDAN: Hello, there!
CURTIS: Hey, look who it is!
RICKY: It's Brendan Fraser!
CHICA: Squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak? (What are you doing here?)
BRENDAN: I'm here to give some entertainment to the audience. I'm going to do some George Carlin stand-up-
RICKY: George Carlin? I don't think his comedy is appropriate enough for our preschool audience.
CURTIS: But, didn't he narrate Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends for a while AND play Mr. Conductor in seasons 2 and 3 of the American Thomas show, Shining Time Station? That's what Star told me, and he's the #1 Thomas fan.
BRENDAN: Yeah, and matter of fact, HE was the one who suggested it to me. Okay, here goes:

This next thing. This next thing is about the English language. Its about little expressions we use. The little expressions, we all use them all the time. And we never really seem to examine these expressions very carefully at all. We just sort of say these things, as if they really made sense.

"You know where you can stick it". Why do we always assume people can know where they can stick it? Suppose you don’t know, suppose you're a new guy. You have absolutely no idea where to stick it. I think there ought to be a government title on “Where to Stick it”. Now that I think of it, I believe there is a government booklet like that, they send it to you on April 15th

"Undisputed Heavyweight Champion". Well, if it's undisputed, whats all the fighting about?

"Takes the cake". You know, they say “Boy, he really takes the cake”... Where? Where do you take a cake? To the movies? You know where I would take a cake, down to the bakery, to see the other cakes. And how come he takes the cake, how come he doesn’t take the pie? The pie is easier carrying then the cake. "Easy as pie!" Hey, wait. Cake is not too hard to carry either. "Piece of cake!"

"Fine and dandy". That’s an old fashion one, isn’t it, yeah? Say to a guy “How are you?” “Fine and dandy.” Not me, I never say that, you know

CHICA: Squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak! (Time for our next song!)

Brendan Fraser starts walking back to his seat.

BRENDAN: I wish more stand-up comedians didn't use inappropriate words.